Don’t blow your own trumpet, people say. So it’s hardly surprising that many of us have problems praising ourselves. To really enjoy successes for which we have worked hard. To look at yourself in the mirror and be proud of yourself.
But that’s completely unjustified! Self-love is not egoism, in fact, it’s the opposite. And yet, many of us have a hard time accepting ourselves.
But the most important thing up front: Self-love is something we can learn.
In this blog post, we’ll explain why it’s worth it and show you strategies to treat yourself more kindly.
Why self-love is not selfishness
The concept of self-love is not about self-centeredness, nor is it about egoism or even narcissism.
In principle, it is about accepting yourself as you are. This applies to the whole package with all strengths and weaknesses. So for your best side as well as your peculiarities and quirks.
Self-love means …
- to pay attention to yourself.
- to recognize and fulfill your needs.
- to treat yourself as lovingly as you would your best friend.
- to allow all feelings and to accept yourself 100%.
- to forgive yourself for mistakes and be grateful.
You are good enough for yourself, virtually your own friend.
Why self-love is a rewarding challenge
Does that sound easier to you than it feels? No worries.
Often, the bad image we have of ourselves is deeply rooted. But self-love is not something you “have” or “don’t have.” Self-love is a process, indeed perhaps a lifelong one. With ups and downs.
We often set excessively high expectations for ourselves. Or we attach conditions to (self) love. Or we think it’s enough if someone else loves us.
But love is like a mirror: If you don’t love yourself, you can’t really allow love from outside. Self-love doesn’t mean you have to sugarcoat everything or lie to yourself. Think of self-love as a relationship with another person you love. You certainly don’t love everything the other person does. You sometimes criticize, maybe you don’t always understand, sometimes you are angry. And yet you love the other person – unconditionally.
Why should it be different with yourself? You are (only) a human being, right? And above all, the most important one in your life!
How to learn to love yourself
How great would it be if you could boost your self-esteem at the touch of a button? Too good to be true.
Self-love is like many other things in life: It only changes when you take charge of it. When you take responsibility – for yourself!
But you’re not on your own when doing that. Here are a few strategies to help you learn to appreciate and love your own value:
1. Speak positively – to yourself and about yourself.
Sentences like “I can’t do it anyway” or “Oh my gosh, I’m so stupid” are easy to say. But would you talk like that to your best friend if she had a bad day? Probably not. You would comfort her and not tell her to stop acting like that. You would respond with understanding and not beat her up for her mistakes. In the same way, you deserve to be good to yourself!
Here’s a little exercise for you: Say three nice things to yourself right now!
- What do you like about yourself?
- What are you good at?
- What achievement are you proud of?
2. Take good care of your body – you only have one.
Whatever you do: You do it for you! You take care of YOURSELF.
Forget all the diets and programs that tell you you’re not good enough. You’re doing intermittent fasting for yourself – for your health and well-being. Because it fits you and your life. Because YOU are important to you.
3. Be honest with yourself – and accept yourself as you are.
Our everyday lives are based on ratings. We share our lives on social media, hoping for likes. We follow other accounts that show nearly unbelievable snapshots.
Yet we often forget how subjective these opinions are. And how staged and retouched such photos are.
Don’t be put off by others, just look at yourself. Start to be interested in yourself, put yourself in the center. You are great the way you are!
4. Take time for yourself – regularly and consciously.
Which things are really binding? For example, having appointments. So plan some conscious “me” time in your calendar, go on a date with yourself!
Free yourself from things that strain and constrict you. No one can see what’s going on inside you. Therefore, dare to say no sometimes. Even if it is difficult at first.
5. Celebrate every success – no matter how small it is.
Be proud of yourself! And even if it was only luck: Be happy about it! Give yourself a pat on the back!
Reward yourself with something that feels good to you. It doesn’t have to be material things. A walk in the woods, your favorite music, an evening to yourself. Anything that makes you happy is allowed!
How Self-Love helps you on your intermittent fasting journey
Self-love means accepting yourself as you are. It is a prerequisite, not the goal of your journey.
Self-love is the condition for a happy relationship – especially with yourself.
Therefore, always remember: You are fasting because you want to do something for yourself. Because you are worth it!
Want to give yourself a treat? Reward your body with a fasting period. You can find the right plan in the BodyFast app.